| Message To Survivors |
Survivors of Childhood Sexual Abuse...
Don't be a Victim any longer... BECOME A SURVIVOR!
The Next Potential Goal... DO MORE THAN JUST SURVIVE!
It was NOT YOUR FAULT!
Regardless of how old you were, regardless of how long it went on & regardless what your Abuser or anyone else has ever told you, it was not your fault. You were a
CHILD...under the age of 18! You were taken advantage of by someone in Authority over you. The only shame in that is that of your Abuser.
Please Do More than Just Hear these Words... BELIEVE IT WITH YOUR WHOLE HEART! It's Truth.
There was nothing that you did to cause your abuse. There was nothing wrong with you why you were picked out. It is as simple as this... Your Abuser either had
access or gained access to you. The raping, molesting & exploiting of children is their (the abuser's) issue; a choice they made. You did nothing wrong. So when
you question why you, why you may not have told anyone or why you didn't or couldn't stop them, remember that you were just a Child.
The Next Potential Goal... DO MORE THAN JUST SURVIVE!
It was NOT YOUR FAULT!
Regardless of how old you were, regardless of how long it went on & regardless what your Abuser or anyone else has ever told you, it was not your fault. You were a
CHILD...under the age of 18! You were taken advantage of by someone in Authority over you. The only shame in that is that of your Abuser.
Please Do More than Just Hear these Words... BELIEVE IT WITH YOUR WHOLE HEART! It's Truth.
There was nothing that you did to cause your abuse. There was nothing wrong with you why you were picked out. It is as simple as this... Your Abuser either had
access or gained access to you. The raping, molesting & exploiting of children is their (the abuser's) issue; a choice they made. You did nothing wrong. So when
you question why you, why you may not have told anyone or why you didn't or couldn't stop them, remember that you were just a Child.
Do More Than Just "Survive"...
"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have
come that they may have life and have it to the full."
(John 10:10)
Something was Stolen from You... Your Innocence! But to let it destroy you
means "the thief" has accomplished exactly what he set out to do.
"Those who created yesterday's pain do not control tomorrow's potential. Satan
discusses your past. That appears to be the only information he has. Jesus
discusses your future. He enters your life to end your past and give birth to
tomorrow."
come that they may have life and have it to the full."
(John 10:10)
Something was Stolen from You... Your Innocence! But to let it destroy you
means "the thief" has accomplished exactly what he set out to do.
"Those who created yesterday's pain do not control tomorrow's potential. Satan
discusses your past. That appears to be the only information he has. Jesus
discusses your future. He enters your life to end your past and give birth to
tomorrow."
Reveal the Truth... Uncover the Crime committed against You when you were a Child. Don't keep it a secret
any longer. There's no shame in it for You, regardless of how it may feel. Again, you were a Child...an Innocent
Victim. But that doesn't mean that you have to remain a Victim for the rest of your life.
Talk About It... There is Healing in being able to talk about the violation you endured as a Child. Find that
person or group that you feel safe with & trust to discuss your abuse openly. The purpose is to face what
happened & move forward. Because of the sensitivity of this topic, if you fail to find that right person/group at first,
try again. There are people out there that are willing to listen. You Are Not Alone.
Seek Professional Help (If Needed/As Needed)... Support Group, Therapy, etc… You can also do your
own research to find the right avenue for you. For example, you may want to talk to your local Pastor about
resources in your area.
Do Something About It... Get involved in the fight against Child Sexual Abuse...whatever that means for you.
Fight hard against the very thing that "tried" to destroy you. Help break the cycle of this horrible crime...Save a Child!
Truly Heal, Overcome, Conquer... The act of sex was created by God & is intended to be a beautiful thing
between a husband and wife. Society (people) have misused sex & distorted it in just about every way possible
you can think of. One of these ways is by the Raping, Molesting & Exploiting of children. It was never meant to be
used as a weapon against anyone, especially innocent children.
"You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done..." (Genesis 50:
20)
"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called
according to His purpose." (Romans 8:28)
God's word says He will take ALL things & use them for good, but YOU have to go to HIM for comfort, healing &
guidance!
any longer. There's no shame in it for You, regardless of how it may feel. Again, you were a Child...an Innocent
Victim. But that doesn't mean that you have to remain a Victim for the rest of your life.
Talk About It... There is Healing in being able to talk about the violation you endured as a Child. Find that
person or group that you feel safe with & trust to discuss your abuse openly. The purpose is to face what
happened & move forward. Because of the sensitivity of this topic, if you fail to find that right person/group at first,
try again. There are people out there that are willing to listen. You Are Not Alone.
Seek Professional Help (If Needed/As Needed)... Support Group, Therapy, etc… You can also do your
own research to find the right avenue for you. For example, you may want to talk to your local Pastor about
resources in your area.
Do Something About It... Get involved in the fight against Child Sexual Abuse...whatever that means for you.
Fight hard against the very thing that "tried" to destroy you. Help break the cycle of this horrible crime...Save a Child!
Truly Heal, Overcome, Conquer... The act of sex was created by God & is intended to be a beautiful thing
between a husband and wife. Society (people) have misused sex & distorted it in just about every way possible
you can think of. One of these ways is by the Raping, Molesting & Exploiting of children. It was never meant to be
used as a weapon against anyone, especially innocent children.
"You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done..." (Genesis 50:
20)
"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called
according to His purpose." (Romans 8:28)
God's word says He will take ALL things & use them for good, but YOU have to go to HIM for comfort, healing &
guidance!
The Effects of Child Sexual Abuse...
| When a child is sexually abused, the affects are immediate and more often than not will extend into adulthood. A book called Surviving Childhood Sexual Abuse by Carolyn Ainscough & Kay Toon says and I quote... "Begin sexually abused is like being involved in a disaster, a disaster that may be a one-time incident or may be repeated over many years." In addition, the book states "Sexual abuse has immediate and long-term affects. Without help, these problems can continue indefinitely. With help, Survivors can and do overcome these problems." The point is that YOU CAN OVERCOME these problems. As you read this section, what we want you to know is that it is normal if you experience some of the effects listed below considering the traumatic experience(s) that you faced as a child. But again, God can heal you. He places people in strategic places that can help you. As stated before, Seek Professional Help if needed & as needed. And Remember... Your Creator is the Ultimate Healer. "Effects of Sexual Abuse" Fears Anxiety Phobias Nervousness Nightmares Sleep Problems Depression Shame Guilt Feeling like a victim Lack of self-confidence Feeling different from others Feeling self-conscious Feeling dirty Feeling unable to act or change situations Obsessed with cleaning or washing Constant worry Suicide attempts Self-harming Blackouts Fits Not remembering what has happened for hours or days (blanking out) Binge-eating Self-induced vomiting Compulsive eating Anorexia nervosa No interest in sex Fear of sex Obsessed with sex Avoiding specific sexual activities Feeling unable to say “No” to sex Aggressive sexual behavior Flashbacks Hearing the abuser’s voice when he or she isn’t there Seeing the abuser’s face when he or she isn’t there Confusion about sexual orientation (homosexual or heterosexual) Confusion about sexual identity (male or female) Unable to get close to people Marrying young to get away from home Marital problems Unable to love, or show affection to, children Excessive fear for children Alcohol problems Drug problems Employment problems Begin re-victimized Criminal Involvement Needing to being control Delinquency Bullying Clinging and being extremely dependent Abusing others Aggressive behavior Anger Hostility Problems communicating Distrusting people Working too hard Difficulty in judging people’s trustworthiness Physical problems Source: "Surviving Childhood Sexual Abuse" [Book by Carolyn Ainscough & Kay Toon] |
Resources...
Be sure to click on Resources for additional information.
| "The World is a dangerous place to live, not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it..." Albert Einstein |
| America... A Safe Place for Children! |
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| "A Safe Place" Workshop Crash Course on the Crime of Child Sexual Abuse [Awareness & Prevention] Workshop Info Sheet (PDF Format) Bring Workshop to Your Area (PDF Format) |
| Susan Suafoa-Dinino, President/Founder of SpeakingOut available for...
SpeakingOut also available for...
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| SpeakingOut News Read / Print Latest Newsletter (PDF Format) January 2012 To access all previous issues of SpeakingOut News, please visit our Home Page. |
| “Imagine if every ADULT who has ever been molested as a child recognized they were not alone. Imagine if every ADULT who has ever been molested as a child let go of a shame that was never theirs to carry. Imagine if every ADULT who has ever been molested as a child found their voice. Imagine if every ADULT who has ever been molested as a child joined hands and told their story. Our country needs us to speak the truth, because we have a nation of adults doubting if there is really a problem or that there even is an epidemic. This journey of honesty is not only to help heal ourselves but to protect this generation of children and the next generation and the next. Sexual Abuse of Children can be Stopped. It needs a voice. Our voice.” -- Randa Fox, NOOW / Not On Our Watch (CoFounder) @ notonourwatch.net |
| As pertaining to the crime of Child Sexual Abuse... Innocence is NOT Lost... it's Stolen! |
| It is my belief that every Child deals with Sexual Abuse in their own way as each Child has their own method of coping with this kind of ultimate violation & betrayal. Likewise, every Adult Survivor will have their own way of dealing with the violations they endured as children. In other words, coping mechanisms & steps toward healing vary depending on the individual person. What works for one person may not work for another. With that being said, the suggestions on the next few pages are just that… Suggestions that represent what has helped and is currently helping me to cope with the tragedies in my life as related to this crime, as well as in my children’s lives. I truly hope this information is of some assistance to you as well, but at a minimum, that it offers words of encouragement. Know this… You are Not Alone! Susan Suafoa-Dinino (President/Founder) |
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