Message To Parents
What Every Parent Should Know...
| Child Safety Begins At Home! |
You may be thinking... “This could never happen to my child”. Unfortunately & as statistics show,
Child Sexual Abuse does happen & it happens often to countless numbers of children...the most
innocent and helpless of victims. I urge you to think about this… these “statistics” are made up
of real children of all ages. As a Parent, I offer this advice...
Never assume that just because you know where your child is & who they
are with, that this could not happen to them.
Child Sexual Abuse can happen ANYWHERE, ANYTIME, TO ANY CHILD!
Never assume that if this happens or is happening to your child that they
would tell you.
Sexual Predators know how to silence children. And as a Parent, your understanding of this
horrific crime is imperative for your child's safety.
Child Sexual Abuse does happen & it happens often to countless numbers of children...the most
innocent and helpless of victims. I urge you to think about this… these “statistics” are made up
of real children of all ages. As a Parent, I offer this advice...
Never assume that just because you know where your child is & who they
are with, that this could not happen to them.
Child Sexual Abuse can happen ANYWHERE, ANYTIME, TO ANY CHILD!
Never assume that if this happens or is happening to your child that they
would tell you.
Sexual Predators know how to silence children. And as a Parent, your understanding of this
horrific crime is imperative for your child's safety.
1) Learn as much as you can about Child Sexual Abuse...
The primary purpose of our Interactive Awareness/Prevention Workshops is to help you learn as
much as you can about this horrible crime. We call our Workshops “A Safe Place” as that is the
goal… America; A Safe Place for Children. Knowledge will help you feel empowered & give
you the tools you need to educate your own child. There are also lots of other resources out
there. The 8 Topics of Discussion at our Workshops are… 1) The Truth & Reality of Child
Sexual Abuse 2) What Child Sexual Abuse Is/Is Not 3) Signs/Symptoms of the Sexually Abused
Child 4) The Statistics 5) Information on the Abuser 6) Information on “The System” 7) What
every Parent Should Know and 8) Message of Hope for Child & Adult Survivors. Be sure to click
on "Upcoming Events/Workshops" for more information.
2) Talk to Your Child...
As Parents, we talk to our children about the importance of education, and the dangers of drugs
& alcohol… just to name a few. We even tell our little ones that no one should ever touch their
"private parts". We like to think that if anyone did touch them, they would tell us. After all, most
younger children cannot keep a secret, right?
The primary purpose of our Interactive Awareness/Prevention Workshops is to help you learn as
much as you can about this horrible crime. We call our Workshops “A Safe Place” as that is the
goal… America; A Safe Place for Children. Knowledge will help you feel empowered & give
you the tools you need to educate your own child. There are also lots of other resources out
there. The 8 Topics of Discussion at our Workshops are… 1) The Truth & Reality of Child
Sexual Abuse 2) What Child Sexual Abuse Is/Is Not 3) Signs/Symptoms of the Sexually Abused
Child 4) The Statistics 5) Information on the Abuser 6) Information on “The System” 7) What
every Parent Should Know and 8) Message of Hope for Child & Adult Survivors. Be sure to click
on "Upcoming Events/Workshops" for more information.
2) Talk to Your Child...
As Parents, we talk to our children about the importance of education, and the dangers of drugs
& alcohol… just to name a few. We even tell our little ones that no one should ever touch their
"private parts". We like to think that if anyone did touch them, they would tell us. After all, most
younger children cannot keep a secret, right?
So What Can You Do...
How To Talk To Your Child...
You cannot protect your child from Sexual Abuse without talking to them about Incest,
Molestation & Rape; at the appropriate age level of course. Children need to know the dangers
out there. They need to know that if this happens or is happening to them that they can
come to you. They need to know that no matter who may be doing this to them, that you will
believe them. They need to feel safe to "tell" on their Abuser.
I want to stress that most children are sexually abused & silenced by someone they know and
far too many are abused by someone they love. A child is generally very trusting of those in
authority over them. This in turn makes a child the most vulnerable of all victims. The younger
the child, the more trusting. Abused children of all ages do keep this secret in most cases.
Please understand this.
Molestation & Rape; at the appropriate age level of course. Children need to know the dangers
out there. They need to know that if this happens or is happening to them that they can
come to you. They need to know that no matter who may be doing this to them, that you will
believe them. They need to feel safe to "tell" on their Abuser.
I want to stress that most children are sexually abused & silenced by someone they know and
far too many are abused by someone they love. A child is generally very trusting of those in
authority over them. This in turn makes a child the most vulnerable of all victims. The younger
the child, the more trusting. Abused children of all ages do keep this secret in most cases.
Please understand this.
| 1 out of 5 Boys will be Sexually Abused by their 18th Birthday 1 out of 3 Girls will be Sexually Abused by their 18th Birthday According to MASA (Mothers Against Sexual Abuse www.againstsexualabuse.org |
In addition, we teach our children to "never talk to strangers".
The problem with stopping there is that "95% of children who are
Sexually Abused know their attacker". These Sexual Predators
are not strangers in most cases. I fear and am certain that by
not talking to children specifically about Sexual Abuse,
Parents may be unknowingly enabling their child to be "easy
prey" for many Sexual Predators.
The problem with stopping there is that "95% of children who are
Sexually Abused know their attacker". These Sexual Predators
are not strangers in most cases. I fear and am certain that by
not talking to children specifically about Sexual Abuse,
Parents may be unknowingly enabling their child to be "easy
prey" for many Sexual Predators.
3) Tell Others...
The more Parents who are aware of the reality & possibility of Child Sexual Abuse and the
more children who know about the dangers, the safer our children will be…all children.
It’s time we send a message to those who prey on innocent children by…
SpeakingOut against Child Sexual Abuse!
The more Parents who are aware of the reality & possibility of Child Sexual Abuse and the
more children who know about the dangers, the safer our children will be…all children.
It’s time we send a message to those who prey on innocent children by…
SpeakingOut against Child Sexual Abuse!
Factors to Consider...
Parents Know Their Child Better Than Anyone...
Talk About In Small Bits, But Often
Seek Professional Help, if needed, prior to talking to your Child
Additional Helpful Information
OVERALL GOAL...
Open Up Communication Line; Not to Instill Fear
- Age of Child
- Maturity of child
- Personality of child
Parents Know Their Child Better Than Anyone...
- (Exception: Childcare Providers) – in some instances
- Extremely Important... Communication between Parents and Childcare Providers &
Teachers
Talk About In Small Bits, But Often
- Repetition = Retention
Seek Professional Help, if needed, prior to talking to your Child
- Lots of Resources Out There
Additional Helpful Information
- Every child is different, so what works for one child will not necessarily work for
another child; even a same-age child. - Examples of concepts you can use when talking to your child... Safe/Unsafe
Touches; Good/Bad Touches; Appropriate/Inappropriate Touches - Can use a Child's Swim Suit area as a starting point, but do keep in mind that the
"swim suit area" does not incorporate all parts of the child's body that can be
violated and/or used to force the child to perform acts on their abuser.
OVERALL GOAL...
Open Up Communication Line; Not to Instill Fear
If Your Child Discloses Sexual Abuse...
According to Child Lures Prevention @ www.childluresprevention.com
During a Disclosure...
After a Disclosure...
Print Out Copy of...
What To Do If Sexual Abuse Occurs (If Your Child Discloses Sexual Abuse)
During a Disclosure...
- Find a private place to talk with your child.
- Do not express panic or shock.
- Reassure your child that you believe them.
- Do not pressure your child to tell you more than s/he is comfortable telling you.
- Ask limited questions.
- Listen.
- Reassure your child that it is good to tell and that you are proud of him/her.
- Reassure you child that it is not his/her fault and s/he is not bad or in trouble.
- Promise your child that you will protect and support him/her.
- If your child sees you are upset, explain you are upset with the abuser… not the child.
- Report the abuse immediately to your local law enforcement agency.
After a Disclosure...
- After your child has revealed abuse, you may be shocked, confused and/or angry.
Regardless of what you are feeling or thinking, it is important to respond to your child
appropriately. - Remember that your child is a child, and treat him/her as such. Don’t expect your child
to respond like an adult. - Be supportive of your child, but do not treat him/her differently.
- Keep to your regular routine as much as possible.
- Do not expect your child to appear “changed”.
- Do not question your child about the abuse; by doing so, you may jeopardize the police
investigation. If your child wishes to discuss the abuse with you, just listen and be
supportive. - Be prepared for depression or “let-down” weeks or months after the disclosure. Your
child may become withdrawn or act out repeatedly over time. - Do not advise your child on what to do or say in a police interview beyond encouraging
them to tell the truth. - Sexually abused children may be susceptible to feelings of low self esteem. Help your
child nurture a positive sense of individual identity with positive messages. - Explain in simple, age-appropriate terms what is happening throughout the police
investigation (or as your child has questions). - Acknowledge any feelings of anger, guilt, frustration, sadness, etc. that your child may
experience. Let your child know it is okay to feel anything. Teach him/her appropriate
ways to express his/her feelings. - Be aware of your own reactions and get support and help as you work through your own
feelings. - Don’t discuss the abuse with others in your child’s presence.
- Children often feel a sense of relief after disclosing abuse. Support from the parent or
caregiver is one of the most important factors in your child’s healing process. By
offering support, you play an important role in your child’s mental and emotional health.
Print Out Copy of...
What To Do If Sexual Abuse Occurs (If Your Child Discloses Sexual Abuse)
| "The World is a dangerous place to live, not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it..." Albert Einstein |
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